A Storyjerking Tear
by JackTheJacker
Summary: It's the late '90s. Two heroes of world animation end up being involved in an unprecedented love triangle against their will. Suspense, comedy and broken hearts ensue.


**A Storyjerking Tear**

Narrator: Hi. I welcome you to my humble abode. I'm sure you're here because you want to hear a story. Well, I'll give you what you want (takes a book from a shelf, open it and starts flipping through it until he stops on one page) Ah. Here is a story that will surely get your attention and keep you glued to the screen for its entire duration. (sits on a sofa and begins to tell) It all began in the late '90s, in a normal Japanese town and a not-so-normal police station...

(The action moves to Japan, and exactly to the Bokuto police station. Inside the building, Mickey, Donald and the Captain are walking in the hallway discussing something)

Captain: You're the best testimonials we could find. Your presence will bring a lot of emphasis to the security course of the police station.

Mickey: I am honored to be able to help improve road safety in your country. Besides, we're not only going to sensitize people, we're going to bring home a lot of money! I mean, we're all gonna make a profit.

(Mickey, Donald and the Captain walk a little further and reach the meeting room. They therefore enter into it)

Captain: Gentlemen, I want to introduce you to the famous Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck. They're gonna be here for a week, being our testimonials for our safety course.

(Yoriko jumps on Mickey Mouse)

Yoriko: I'm a big fan of yours, Mr. Mickey! Can you get me an autograph?

Mickey: Well, you don't say no to a fan. (signature on Yoriko's notepad)

Donald: (looks at Mickey with contempt) You're always at the center of attention! Not a single line has been ever devoted to the great Donald Duck, who with his misadventures has made laugh but also cry thousands of people around the world.

Mickey: You're just jealous!

Captain: Yoriko, please, a little self-control.

Yoriko: (embarassed) Sorry, Captain.

Captain: Good. Mr. Mickey, Mr. Donald, meet Miyuki Kobayakawa and Natsumi Tsujimoto, two of our best recruits!

Mickey: (approaches them and shakes hands with them) It's a pleasure, but we already know each other!

Captain: Really? And how did you two meet?

Mickey: It's not a very interesting story... (laughs and then looks at Donald with an accusatory face)

Donald: (confused) What have I done?

**FLASHBACK**

(The action shifts to a quiet street, when suddenly Donald's car speeds by)

Mickey: You're going too fast, you're going too fast!

Donald: We're 25 minutes late, what do you want me to do?

Mickey: It's all your fault! You should have woken up at the scheduled time and not one hour later!

Donald Duck: Whatever. It's too late now. Let's rather think about getting there in time.

Mickey: Okay, but you'll pay the bill!

(Donald and Mickey cross a police checkpoint, exceeding the speed limit by 3 mph. Natsumi and Miyuki find out and go chasing the two. Donald turns around and sees the car of the two policewomen chasing them)

Donald: The police is after us!

Mickey: (with sarcastic tone) How strange...

Donald: (makes a detour and escapes the two policewomen) There we go, we escaped them! Hooray!

Mickey: DONALD, BE CAREFUL!

(Donald looks at the road and screams. There's a light pole in front of them. Donald tries to deflect but the car slams into the light pole)

Donald: ...

(Natsumi and Miyuki reach Donald's car and stop on its left)

Natsumi: Well, sir, speeding, dangerous detours, entry to the road with forbidden access... that'll be a 70,000 yen fine.

Donald: How much is it in dollars?

Mickey: (takes a calculator and types in) So, taking into account exchange rate, arrangements, etc. etc. etc. etc.. 650 dollars.

Donald: What? (turns his eyes to Miyuki and Natsumi) OBJECTION, YOUR HONOR! I'M NEVER GONNA PAY THAT!

Natsumi: All right, the alternative is prison. What do you choose?

Donald: (compliant face) Do you know a bureau de change?

Mickey: Did you forget to change the money, too?

Donald: MICKEY, SHUT UP!

**END OF FLASHBACK**

Mickey: Well, the fine has been paid, so I'd say it's better not to think about it anymore and go have a nice aperitif.

(The action moves to a pub in the city during the evening hours. While Natsumi and Miyuki are drinking fresh water, Donald and Mickey are at the cash register ordering something)

Donald Duck: I'll have some sake and sushi for two, please.

(The barman gives them a tray with some sake and sushi. Donald takes the tray and they sit at the table next to Natsumi and Miyuki's)

Donald: I must say that, as unpleasant as she is, the redhead is kind of hot!

Mickey: You already have a girlfriend, don't even think about it!

Natsumi: (looks at her watch) It's late, I have to go home!

Miyuki: Go ahead.

(Nakajima gets in the pub and approaches the cash register to order something)

Nakajima: I'd like to order some sake and sushi.

(The barman gives Nakajima a tray with some sake and some sushi. Nakajima takes the tray and before sitting he hears a voice calling him)

Mickey: Hey, sit here.

Nakajima: (sits down around the same table as Mickey and Donald) Mr. Mickey. How are you, you and your friend? Do you like our country?

Mickey: It's great! (curious face) Um... Is everything okay with your girlfriend?

Nakajima: I wouldn't call her "girlfriend", let's say... "heart colleague".

Donald: (smiles mischievously) Someone is afraid to declare himself, isn't he? Who's this girl?

Mickey: Miyuki, the blue-haired one.

Donald: Don't worry, now comes Uncle Donald solving everything. (searches into his pockets) Voilà, Jack the Wizard's magic potion!

Mickey: Jack the Wizard? That old dwarf who always stands near our house selling useless trinkets and selling clam chowder as magic potions?

Donald: This time it's not a trinket. This is the magic potion of the great magician Lovestradamus, the magician of love.

Mickey: All right... (rolls eyes) Even if it worked, I don't think we should get involved in other people's love affairs!

Donald: Oh, enough with all this fake morality! Give me a piece of paper instead. (gets a piece of paper) If I write the name of the person we want to make fall in love with on a piece of paper (places the piece of paper, takes the ampoule, opens it) and I throw it into the ampoule (takes the piece of paper, throws it into the ampoule and closes it. The piece of paper melts and merges with the liquid contained in the ampoule), whoever drinks the potion will be the object of the love passions of the name written on the leaflet!

Mickey: It seems to me to be pointlessly complicated as a method.

Donald: Don't talk to me about it, talk to Lovestradamus. Now drink, Naka, Noko, Niko, Noku...

Nakajima: Nakajima!

Donald: Whatever. Drink up, come on.

Nakajima: (opens the ampoule and drinks its contents) Bleah! It tastes like cheese that's been out of date for at least 40 years!

Donald: It doesn't matter, as long as it works.

(A distinctly feminine voice shouting the name of Nakajima is suddenly heard. The three come out of the window but the one who cries out the name of Nakajima is not Miyuki, but Natsumi. Mickey watches Donald with irritation)

Mickey: Do you have any explanation for this?

Donald: Well, I wrote Natsumi like you asked.

Mickey: Natsumi?

Donald: Yes, the blue-haired cop, right?

Mickey: The blue-haired one is Miyuki.

Donald: (doubtful) ...wasn't it Natsumi?

(Mickey and Nakajima facepalm. Nakajima starts to feel strange)

Nakajima: I feel weird... but it's a fantastic feeling... it's... it's... (jumps) LOVE PASSION! (runs as fast as Beep-Beep) NATSUMI, MY LOVE, HERE I COME! (the two of them start hugging and making out)

Donald: (checks out the ampoule and then laughs nervously) Hey, Mickey, want to know something really funny?  
Mickey: What?

Donald: Apparently there's a small inscription on the label of the ampoula that says...

Mickey: It says what?

Donald: ...anyone who drinks the love potion and is not in love with the person whose name is written on the paper will automatically fall in love with him/her.

Mickey: ...Excuse me a moment. (approaches the bar's wall and starts to bang his head against it repeatedly, while Donald looks with concern at Natsumi and Nakajima kissing each other)

Narrator: (cue tense music) Well, the potion did not work as it should. (coughs) What would Miyuki's reaction be if she found out about this absurd situation? And how will our heroes respond to this strange love duo? And above all, will the heir of Hokuto be able to defeat the Namek people? (scratched record sound) The hell is this? Did someone mix up the scripts or something? (coughs) Anyway, to find out what will happen, stay with us.


End file.
